The Fickle Mistress Which Makes Fools of Us All

The way we perceive time is an illusion.  Far be it from a constant stream, our memories about events is a mishmash of the truth mixed with how we wanted things to have happen.

The past is immutable, no matter how much we want to think otherwise. Things weren’t easier or better when you were younger, you were. The world wasn’t all rainbows and gum drops, you were naive.

We all have regrets but that doesn’t mean we should be a slave to them. Learn from your mistakes and move on. It’s pointless to try to change the past because then you would change yourself. Who you are is the sum of all the events that have shaped your life from the moment you were born.

We all have goals for the future but remember it’s in constant flux, so we must be open to the prospect that our plans must change if things don’t work out the way we want them to.

This doesn’t mean you stop dreaming or setting goals. No, it means being realistic about achieving them. If you find yourself in your thirties without a contract maybe it times to give up your dreams of being a professional athlete. Likewise if you’re pushing fifty maybe it’s best you give up the notion you’re still a young stud.

Cognitive dissonance is a trip that can delude us into believing things which aren’t true because they are comforting. “I can stop drinking anytime I want to,” says the alcoholic. “I don’t have a problem,” says the drug addict as she sells herself for that next hit. The point is whether you want to believe it or not the truth remains the same.

So often we get stuck pinning for a past that never was and a future that may never be we miss out on what’s happening in the present. This moment, right now is all we have. For better or worse it’s what makes up the bulk of our life.

We can drift from one millstone or achievement, or we can choose to live in the present, acknowledge the past and the lessons it can teach us, and shape the future the best we can. I thought I had everything figured out and then life came and threw those plans out the window. I’m a control freak but I’ve learned to adapt on the fly and live in the moment. The question is: do you?