It always struck me weird how certain straight characters showed little interest in the opposite sex and were they real would have come out by now.
1. Holden Caulfield
The prototypical hipster, Holden’s closest is so deep he has property in Narnia. If the fact he comments on several of his handsome school mates weren’t enough of a giveaway, this coupled with his hissy fit over Stradlater not telling him if he slept with Jane should have made it clear he batted for the other team.
Holden wasn’t jealous of Stradlater, he was jealousy of Jane getting the old hot beef injection. And when given a chance to sleep with a hooker he wimps out and talks to her instead.
Last but not least let’s not forget Holden is your text book bitter queen who isn’t happy unless he’s complaining about something, or bitching about someone being a phony. I dare you to tell me he wouldn’t fit in at any gay bar on a Friday night.
2. Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy
We all know Dumbledore wasn’t the only gay in Hogwarts. Harry playing the part of the hero hid his burgeoning homosexuality out of fear it might lower morale when the war kicked into high gear. It wouldn’t be the first time a celebrity did this nor would it be out of character for Harry to fake it with Ginny so he had the family he always wanted.
Note how he doesn’t notice girls until third year, yet only after Ron and the others make dating an issue in 4th year does he attempt to ask out Cho Chang. Also note that Ron, Not Cho, was the thing he treasured most and had to retrieve for the second task. When Harry and Cho finally go out in fifth year it lasts one deleterious date and that’s it.
Notice how Harry never batted an eye when Ginny began dating in fifth year, yet we’re suppose to believe he became obsessed with her in sixth year and settled down with her when they’ve spent zero page time together?
Nope either Ginny slipped him some grade A love potion or she’s just his beard. Much as I loath post Order of The Phoenix Ginny option B is more likely.
As for Malfoy it was obvious from book one he had a fan boy crush on Potter, but it morphed into a full on man crush as the series progressed. Harry being a naive little shit didn’t realize he stomped Draco’s heart, and to make matters worse was crushing big time on Ron circa second year when the Weasleys rescued him.
Fast forward to third year and Ron reveals himself to be straight. Harry turns his affection to the Malfoy. Yes Draco was a bully but how many times have you seen boys pick on girls they like, so why should these two gay boys be different?
It’s understandable they had to keep their relationship under wraps. Him the last Malfoy scion, death eater in waiting and Slytherin Prince while Harry was the pride of Gryffindor and Dumbledore’s golden boy.
Think back on all their fights and see it was them finding excuses to be around each. Yes it’s quite easy to see them getting detentions together just so they could snog themselves silly once Snape left.
When Harry couldn’t take the constantly sneaking around and fear of being outted he broke it off with Malfoy and hooked up with Ginny.
As a final token of their love Malfoy didn’t reveal it was Harry the Snatchers caught. Of course they both could be bisexual and passing for straight as well. Either way Draco and Harry were totally into each other.
So am I crazy, and if so why? Or what other characters do you think are LGBT?