Set a year after “Darius the Great Is Not Okay,” “Darius the Great Deserves Better,” by Adibe Khorram, finds Darius Kellner on his school’s soccer team with new friends, an internship at his dream tea shop, and a beautiful boyfriend.

But all is not well: Darius’s parents are struggling to make ends meet following their trip to Iran, his sister is the target of racist bullies at school, his father is going through a depressive episode, and his boyfriend is pressuring him to have sex.

Also, he’s become best friends with Chip Cusumano and is attracted to him.

I loved the first book and wanted to love this one, but it just wasn’t as good. The plot was a hot mess and I felt Khorram tried to cover too much at once, resulting in book that lacked focus.

The magic in book one was missing in this one as Darius all but forget about Sohrab, only contacting him when he needed someone to vent to.

As for Darius’s grandmothers, Oma and Grandma, they were so underdeveloped it was hard to distinguish one from the other, which was also the case for most of Darius’s friends from the soccer team.

Moreover, the relationships between Darius and Landon and Darius and Chip lacked any chemistry, and by the end I didn’t care who he ended up with.

And speaking of endings, this one sucked. Things were building up to a climax and then the story ended without resolving most of the plot lines.

So many of the conflicts in this book could have been easily solved had Darius and the other characters just talked to each other.

I also thought the bi rep was awful as Landon, who’s bi, was depicted as only caring about sex.

However, I did like the mental health rep in this book. I also connected with Darius’s struggles with his weight and body image issues and liked that Khorram didn’t magically make him a ripped Adonis.

Overall, I didn’t like this book and only recommend you rent it from the library.

I give “Darius the Great Deserves Better” 2.8 out of 5 stars.

Introduction

Welcome back.

Most of us have heard of famous Black writers such as James Baldwin, W. E. B. Du Bois, Zora Neale Hurston, Maya Angelou, Toni Morrison and Langston Hughes. However, few outside the Black community realize the barriers imposed on them because of their race.

White literary reviewers criticized Hurston’s work for including “stereotypical” Black characters. Moreover, some Black intellectuals of the era criticized her for using the dialect of rural Black people and including characters who were “inappropriate” and “backwards”.

Likewise, James Baldwin found the racism of white people and the homophobia of the Black community and larger society so stifling to his work that he moved to France.

And W. E. B Du Bois is simultaneously revered and reviled for his writings on race in America, particularly for his promotion of and popularizing of the talented tenth, the concept that only the top ten percent of Black people should be allowed access to higher learning and leadership positions in the Black community.

Hughes, Angelou, and Morrison also had to contend with criticism of their work through the lens of whiteness, while simultaneous being critiqued by Black intellectuals for “holding them back” by focusing on topics like slavery and racism, and for discussing the problems of the Black community publicly.  

But Black writers and content creators have always had to walk the edge of keeping it real while making a living, which often means we must choose between wanting to be authentic and wanting to make money.

If you’ve followed book twitter at all in recent years, then you know how publishing devalues Black writers and their work. Hashtag PublishingPaidMe was started by black speculative fiction writer L.L. McKinney (full disclosure: I follower her on twitter) to highlight how the publishing industry has a history of paying Black writers lower advances than their white peers.

There have also been ongoing discussions among Black writers about how agents, editors, and publishing companies have wanted us to whitewash our stories, so they appeal to a larger (read: whiter) audience. This doesn’t make sense as the majority of writers and books published are by and feature white people, as evidence by this 2019 study by lee &Low  and this 2020 study by The New York Times. So, there’s a hunger for book by and about Black people

In response, Dhonielle Clayton ( whom I also follow on twitter) and others started the We NeedDiverseBooks hashtag and the organization of the same name.

But even with efforts like this, Black writers have a hard time not only being published but taken seriously due to the unfair expectations placed on them and the preconceptions about them and their work they must deal with, which I’ll discuss next.

Preconceptions

The greatest preconception Black writers must contend with is they aren’t as good as white writers because they aren’t as educated or skilled, and only got a seat at the table for diversity points.

Nnedi Okorafor, the Nigerian-American speculative fiction writer who also holds a PhD in English, was the subject of a backlash when she was nominated for the 2016 Hugo Award. Members of a voting bloc called the Sad Puppies, made up of mostly white males, tried to game the nominations so their favorite white male authors got all the slots.

Their campaign was ultimately unsuccessful, but this points to a larger problem: namely that Black writers and their stories are devalued. Often, we must be ten times better just to be seen on par with mediocre white writers and our work is often held to different standards.

For example if a white writer makes a mistake about depicting trans or immigrant characters, they’re given infinity chance to “grow and learn from their mistakes.” However, when Black writers make such mistakes, they are the subjects of internet harassment mobs who seek to get them fired, or threaten their lives for not using the right pronouns or getting a minor detail wrong.

  And if a book by a Black writer succeeds, it’s often because it’s written to the white gaze. We are often forced to mine our trauma as fodder for these white readers, thus that’s all that gets published and all we can write.

But Black people are more than racism, slavery, gang violence, and being poor. Our stories rang from the tragic to the heroic and everything in between. Yet, we aren’t allowed to explore this wide spectrum of experiences because only white narratives are deemed universal, and publishers can’t risk offending their base.

Yet when we point out how fucked up this is, how it’s a part of institutional racism and upholds systems of white supremacy, we pigeonholed as the angry Black man/woman and get the label: difficult to work with.

Black writers don’t have to contend with just the above. As I’ll lay out next, we also have to deal with unrealistic and unfair expectations.

Expectations

As black writers, we are expected to represent the experience of all Black people. The problem with this is that’s impossible. So when we don’t do this, we get criticized for not being Black enough, or being too Black and playing into stereotypes.

The truth is there’s no one way to be Black, so of course Black writers won’t write the same types of stories or focus on the same subjects. And this is a good thing. We need stories diverse in both subject matter and narratives.

Another expectation we must deal with is the belief there can only be one famous Black writer at a time. When we query books, agents often tell us indirectly they can’t take on another book by a Black author because they’re already publishing one this cycle. Yet they have a billion books by white writers. This results in a bottle neck of books by Black, so that one Black writer is pushed forward then ignored.

Moreover, when there’s more than one writer of color trending at a time, the media will often try to pit them against each other, as though people can’t read both a book by a Black writer and one by an Asian Pacific Islander.

The truth is Black writers are expected to outperform their white peers before agents or agents will even consider them. Inclusion and diversity are just buzz words the publishing industry uses to seem woke, but time and again they’ve proven that they only care about Black folks when it’s politically and monetarily convenient.

 I and other Black writers saw this first-hand last summer when, during the height of the protests following George Floyd’s murder, agents put BLM in their bio and opened their DM’s solely to Black Writers. Flashforward a year and many of those same agents ghosted us, and they did the same thing re: Asian and  Pacific Islander writers following the Atlanta spa shootings back in March.    

Publishing talks a good game about being progressive, yet they continually pick books by white people over own vice works.

Conclusion

The truth is Black writers have always had to contend with barriers imposed on them by both the Black community and the larger society as a whole. Diversity in publishing and the media will continue being an issue as long as we continue playing their game. We must stop. sitting at the table if it means compromising our values and dehumanizing us.   

Hell, flip the table and make your own game. We need to write whatever we want and screw being marketable, which is just code for being palatable to the white masses.

Write your truth and fuck the haters.

Call To Action

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I usually make detailed outlined for my blogs, but today I’m going to try writing from the hip.

When I first got my breathing tube at age seven, chronicled here, the doctors told me it would only be for six months.

But here I am with it still, thirty years later.

A Series of Unfortunate Events

I’ve had multiple reconstructive surgeries over the decades, but something always went wrong. After the first surgery—which involved them harvesting rib cartilage to use as a stint in my airway—my doctors were able to reverse the tracheostomy. But my airway collapsed because it hadn’t yet healed before they woke me from the medically induced coma. I had to have another tracheotomy, and when I had the next reconstructive surgery a few years later, the same as the first one, it failed too.

The third attempt involved my having a two breathing tubes, one in the throat and one down it to open my airway. It failed too, and I had another case of Stevens-Johnson syndrome due to the post operative antibiotic my doctors gave me.

I had my last reconstructive surgery at sixteen and it involved my surgeon removing a section of my windpipe where scar tissue kept forming and reconnecting it. This one worked—kind of.

Afterward, I could partially breathe through my mouth and nose, but not enough to have my breathing tube removed; my surgeon said my airway was now open, but it was twisted, and I needed a series of surgeries to straighten it out. Also, I again had an allergic reaction to the postoperative antibiotic.

Since then, the last surgery I had was at 25 to have my vocal cords unfused.

I’ve given up hope of ever getting rid of this hunk of plastic in my neck; I’ve had it for most of my life, so what’s the point of more surgeries that probably won’t work anyway?

I’ve made peace with this. It’s who I am, and I don’t want to risk destroying what ability I have to speak and breathe through my nose and mouth.

In another decade, I might revisit the issue, if medical technology has advanced to the point it’s feasible to reverse my tracheostomy.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading. If you liked this post, let me know in the comments. Please sign up for my newsletter, add Palingenesis on Goodreads, and if you’re inclined, you can buy a copy here.

Introduction

Welcome readers!

 Those of you who’ve followed me on twitter awhile have heard me talk about my WIP for years, and I finally released it September 1^st.

The idea for Palingenesis had been in my head since middle school, and after over a decade of working on and off it, I’ve learned many lessons, five of which I’ll explore today.

Lesson 1: Start Now!

The sooner you start writing, the faster you’ll get better. No time will ever be right, but you have to write anyway. I thought you had to know everything about writing before you could put words to the page, so I devoured every book, article, and webinar on the subject. Yet I didn’t write—at least not consistently.

I spent large chunks of my teens and twenties playing with the idea of being a writer, only writing when I was inspired or when it felt right.  If I could do it over again, I’d have started writing as soon as I could. No amount of knowledge will help you be a better writer if you don’t write. Forget shooting for perfection your first time. Write horrible first drafts and learn as you go.  And once you have a few manuscripts under your belt, you won’t completely suck.

However, as Hemingway said,

“We are all apprentices in a craft where no one becomes a master.”

Lesson 2: Check Your Ego

No one starts out writing masterpieces, so be open to constructive criticism, and give yourself time to hone your skills. It takes time to get good at anything, so stay humble and accept you aren’t as good as you think you are. Trust me, I know this firsthand. I was an insufferable novice who thought I didn’t need to follow things like story beats or consistent point of view and characterization.

I got a reality check when my precious self-insert fanfic got roasted, and rightly so. No matter how good you get, there are still things to learn.  

Which leads me to my next point. Everyone won’t like what you write, and that’s okay. Don’t respond to reviews good or bad. This is considered highly unprofessionally, not to mention immature, and you don’t want to make a name for yourself as the thin-skinned author who harasses reviewers. Instead, focus on writing the best book you can, and your fans will thank you.

I know in the age of instant gratification we live in it gives us all the feels when people like and share our work, but don’t chase external validation. Your work matters regardless of whether it’s popular. Write because it’s what makes you happiest, not because it might make you rich and famous.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I’ve fantasized of my work being made into a block buster movie, as I’m sure most writers have. But the truth is we write because it’s what we’re called to do, even if we never make a dime from it.

While it’d be nice to be the next Stephen King or George RR Martin, we must keep things realistic and shoot to be the next “us.” This leads me to my next point.

Lesson 3: Don’t Compare Yourself to Other Writers

We are all at different points in the process and comparing your first book to someone’s twentieth is like comparing a pebble to Mt Everest. There are things you’re good at while others suck at and vis versa; ask a fish to act like a horse and it’ll fail but ask it to act like a fish and it’ll excel. Do what you do best and don’t try to imitate others because a facsimile can never beat the original.

Besides, other writers aren’t your competition anyway. There are enough readers for everyone to make a living; jealousy of other writers will make you bitter and distract you from your primary goal: writing and selling your work.

Ultimately, the only writer we should be comparing ourselves to is ourselves.

Lesson 4: Write First for Yourself

We must first aim to please ourselves and then readers. This means setting standards for our work. Any fuckwit with access to a computer and the internet can slap a manuscript on Amazon and call themselves an author.

But that doesn’t make them one.

First, as self-published authors we must overcome the stigma the comes with it. And that means writing a book as good, if not better than a traditionally published one, which means we can’t half-ass things. You must set standards for what you’re comfortable releasing into the world. Set them and always try to meet or surpass them.

Second, write what you’re passionate about. Don’t chase trends, because they will have passed by the time your book is ready for publication. Instead, create them. Write the books only you can. Write from the heart and it will resonate with like-minded people; they will be your hardcore fans.

Third, don’t be afraid of offending people by including politics and social issues you’re passionate about. Writing is inherently political, and some people aren’t happy unless they’re finding fault with something. As I said above, no book will be universally liked. Stay true to your values and beliefs and your book will find an audience.

Your motivation for writing has to be strong enough to weather the storms because the road to publication is a long and lonely one. Trust me, I know. 

Lesson 5: Perseverance

As I wrote here, writing, like life, is a work is progress. There were many times I’ve doubted myself and my skills and whether I should be doing something else with my life that was easier than this.

But every time I wanted to give up, my WIP called out to me to finish it. So, I kept plugging away at it. Why would I inflect this madness upon myself? Because I know a book like this would have helped me a ton had it been a round when I was a teen. I remember what it was like being a geeky, queer, Black kid in the Midwest starved for depictions of myself. So, I write for the boy I was and all the those like me.

The journey to a published book is a marathon not a sprint. Sometimes it will feel like everyone except you is getting an agent/book deal or releasing a book. I’m not gonna lie: it sucks, especially when you see authors who churn out multiple books a year, while you’ve been working on yours forever. But trust me, have patience. Keep at it and your time will come.  

Conclusion

Writing has been my constant companion; it’s gotten me through the deepest of depressions when just getting out of bed was a Herculean effort. And during this pandemic it’s kept me sane as I revised and edited my WIP and worked on blogs and short stories. Writing is how I make sense of myself and the world around me, and I’d be lost without it.

Writing Palingenesis has taught me so much about myself and how I want to use it to empower LGBTQ+ people of color and other marginalized folks. Wherever you’re at on the journey know it’s worth it. Don’t give up.

If you’ve enjoyed this post, please share it on social media. And if you’re inclined below is the buy link for Palingenesis.

Books2read.com/Palingenesis