Thirty Years Later

creative commons via wikipedia

I usually make detailed outlined for my blogs, but today I’m going to try writing from the hip.

When I first got my breathing tube at age seven, chronicled here, the doctors told me it would only be for six months.

But here I am with it still, thirty years later.

A Series of Unfortunate Events

I’ve had multiple reconstructive surgeries over the decades, but something always went wrong. After the first surgery—which involved them harvesting rib cartilage to use as a stint in my airway—my doctors were able to reverse the tracheostomy. But my airway collapsed because it hadn’t yet healed before they woke me from the medically induced coma. I had to have another tracheotomy, and when I had the next reconstructive surgery a few years later, the same as the first one, it failed too.

The third attempt involved my having a two breathing tubes, one in the throat and one down it to open my airway. It failed too, and I had another case of Stevens-Johnson syndrome due to the post operative antibiotic my doctors gave me.

I had my last reconstructive surgery at sixteen and it involved my surgeon removing a section of my windpipe where scar tissue kept forming and reconnecting it. This one worked—kind of.

Afterward, I could partially breathe through my mouth and nose, but not enough to have my breathing tube removed; my surgeon said my airway was now open, but it was twisted, and I needed a series of surgeries to straighten it out. Also, I again had an allergic reaction to the postoperative antibiotic.

Since then, the last surgery I had was at 25 to have my vocal cords unfused.

I’ve given up hope of ever getting rid of this hunk of plastic in my neck; I’ve had it for most of my life, so what’s the point of more surgeries that probably won’t work anyway?

I’ve made peace with this. It’s who I am, and I don’t want to risk destroying what ability I have to speak and breathe through my nose and mouth.

In another decade, I might revisit the issue, if medical technology has advanced to the point it’s feasible to reverse my tracheostomy.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading. If you liked this post, let me know in the comments. Please sign up for my newsletter, add Palingenesis on Goodreads, and if you’re inclined, you can buy a copy here.

The Road so Far: The Five Lessons Self-Publishing Palingenesis has Taught Me

Introduction

Welcome readers!

 Those of you who’ve followed me on twitter awhile have heard me talk about my WIP for years, and I finally released it September 1st.

The idea for Palingenesis had been in my head since middle school, and after over a decade of working on and off it, I’ve learned many lessons, five of which I’ll explore today.

Lesson 1: Start Now!

The sooner you start writing, the faster you’ll get better. No time will ever be right, but you have to write anyway. I thought you had to know everything about writing before you could put words to the page, so I devoured every book, article, and webinar on the subject. Yet I didn’t write—at least not consistently.

I spent large chunks of my teens and twenties playing with the idea of being a writer, only writing when I was inspired or when it felt right.  If I could do it over again, I’d have started writing as soon as I could. No amount of knowledge will help you be a better writer if you don’t write. Forget shooting for perfection your first time. Write horrible first drafts and learn as you go.  And once you have a few manuscripts under your belt, you won’t completely suck.

However, as Hemingway said,

“We are all apprentices in a craft where no one becomes a master.”

Lesson 2: Check Your Ego

No one starts out writing masterpieces, so be open to constructive criticism, and give yourself time to hone your skills. It takes time to get good at anything, so stay humble and accept you aren’t as good as you think you are. Trust me, I know this firsthand. I was an insufferable novice who thought I didn’t need to follow things like story beats or consistent point of view and characterization.

I got a reality check when my precious self-insert fanfic got roasted, and rightly so. No matter how good you get, there are still things to learn.  

Which leads me to my next point. Everyone won’t like what you write, and that’s okay. Don’t respond to reviews good or bad. This is considered highly unprofessionally, not to mention immature, and you don’t want to make a name for yourself as the thin-skinned author who harasses reviewers. Instead, focus on writing the best book you can, and your fans will thank you.

I know in the age of instant gratification we live in it gives us all the feels when people like and share our work, but don’t chase external validation. Your work matters regardless of whether it’s popular. Write because it’s what makes you happiest, not because it might make you rich and famous.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I’ve fantasized of my work being made into a block buster movie, as I’m sure most writers have. But the truth is we write because it’s what we’re called to do, even if we never make a dime from it.

While it’d be nice to be the next Stephen King or George RR Martin, we must keep things realistic and shoot to be the next “us.” This leads me to my next point.

Lesson 3: Don’t Compare Yourself to Other Writers

We are all at different points in the process and comparing your first book to someone’s twentieth is like comparing a pebble to Mt Everest. There are things you’re good at while others suck at and vis versa; ask a fish to act like a horse and it’ll fail but ask it to act like a fish and it’ll excel. Do what you do best and don’t try to imitate others because a facsimile can never beat the original.

Besides, other writers aren’t your competition anyway. There are enough readers for everyone to make a living; jealousy of other writers will make you bitter and distract you from your primary goal: writing and selling your work.

Ultimately, the only writer we should be comparing ourselves to is ourselves.

Lesson 4: Write First for Yourself

We must first aim to please ourselves and then readers. This means setting standards for our work. Any fuckwit with access to a computer and the internet can slap a manuscript on Amazon and call themselves an author.

But that doesn’t make them one.

First, as self-published authors we must overcome the stigma the comes with it. And that means writing a book as good, if not better than a traditionally published one, which means we can’t half-ass things. You must set standards for what you’re comfortable releasing into the world. Set them and always try to meet or surpass them.

Second, write what you’re passionate about. Don’t chase trends, because they will have passed by the time your book is ready for publication. Instead, create them. Write the books only you can. Write from the heart and it will resonate with like-minded people; they will be your hardcore fans.

Third, don’t be afraid of offending people by including politics and social issues you’re passionate about. Writing is inherently political, and some people aren’t happy unless they’re finding fault with something. As I said above, no book will be universally liked. Stay true to your values and beliefs and your book will find an audience.

Your motivation for writing has to be strong enough to weather the storms because the road to publication is a long and lonely one. Trust me, I know. 

Lesson 5: Perseverance

As I wrote here, writing, like life, is a work is progress. There were many times I’ve doubted myself and my skills and whether I should be doing something else with my life that was easier than this.

But every time I wanted to give up, my WIP called out to me to finish it. So, I kept plugging away at it. Why would I inflect this madness upon myself? Because I know a book like this would have helped me a ton had it been a round when I was a teen. I remember what it was like being a geeky, queer, Black kid in the Midwest starved for depictions of myself. So, I write for the boy I was and all the those like me.

The journey to a published book is a marathon not a sprint. Sometimes it will feel like everyone except you is getting an agent/book deal or releasing a book. I’m not gonna lie: it sucks, especially when you see authors who churn out multiple books a year, while you’ve been working on yours forever. But trust me, have patience. Keep at it and your time will come.  

Conclusion

Writing has been my constant companion; it’s gotten me through the deepest of depressions when just getting out of bed was a Herculean effort. And during this pandemic it’s kept me sane as I revised and edited my WIP and worked on blogs and short stories. Writing is how I make sense of myself and the world around me, and I’d be lost without it.

Writing Palingenesis has taught me so much about myself and how I want to use it to empower LGBTQ+ people of color and other marginalized folks. Wherever you’re at on the journey know it’s worth it. Don’t give up.

If you’ve enjoyed this post, please share it on social media. And if you’re inclined below is the buy link for Palingenesis.

Books2read.com/Palingenesis

Character Profile: Amber Turner

Description

 Amber Kathleen-Cleaver Turner is ten-and-a-half years old, four-foot-seven and seventy-eight pounds. She has curly light brown hair, hazel eyes, and light brown skin.

Personality

  She is boy-crazy, outgoing, and friendly, but can be a total brat when she doesn’t get her way.  She’s smart but chooses to play dumb and thinks she’s a Disney Princess.

Likes

 Amber loves texting and talking with her friends and her phone is practically glued to her hands. She also likes makeup and frilly dresses, and still plays with dolls. She’s also obsessed with K-pop boy bands like BTS, EXO, and SHINee. She also loves Disney movies.

Dislikes

 Amber dislikes not being old enough to date, not fitting in, and being treated like a baby. She also hates that her parents won’t let her stay home alone. She also can’t stand insects and hates cats.

Goals

 Her main goal is getting a boyfriend and having her first kiss before all her friends. Also, she wants to have a separate, coed birthday party.

Desires

 Amber greatest desire is to be seen as her own person separate from her twin brother Bobby. She also doesn’t want to be treated like a little kid anymore and wants to be the most popular girl in school.

Fears

  Her greatest fear is losing her friends and being alone.

Morality/ Religious Beliefs

 Morally, Amber is lawful good and follows the rules. Religiously, She’s Catholic and tries to be on her best behavior.

Political Alignment

  If she were old enough to vote, Amber would be a democrat.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading and be sure to share this on social media. Next week’s post will be on the lessons I’ve learned self-publishing Palingenesis, my debut YA dark SFF novel, which is available now.

Character Profile Bobby Turner

Description

RobertBobby” Seale Turner is 10-and-a-half years old, four-foot-seven and seventy-five pounds, with dark brown eyes and skin and finger wave black hair. He wears a durag.

Personality

 Bobby is an entitled brat and picks on Travis because he knows their parents will always take his side. He fancies himself a rapper and gangbanger.

Likes

 He’s into rap, being “street”, acting like a tough guy, and being a jerk. He also likes causing trouble, pulling pranks, and being the center of attention.

Dislikes

 He dislikes schoolwork, preferring video games and rapping to arithmetic and reading. He hates doing his chores and would rather spend time with his friends than stay at home. He also hates Travis because of all the attention their parents have given him over the years.

Goals

 His sole goal in life is to become a rich and famous rapper.

Desires

 Bobby craves attentions and wants money and the women that come with it.

Fears

 Bobby’s greatest fear is that one day Travis will stand up to him and kick his ass.

Morality/Religious Beliefs

  Morally, Bobby is chaotic neutral only caring about his wants and needs, disregarding the rules and doing whatever he wants. Religiously he’s Catholic, but sins during the week and gets absolution on Sundays.

Political Alignment

 If Bobby were old enough to vote he’d be a Libertarian, believing in the most freedom for himself and screw everyone else.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading. Next week’s post will be on Bobby’s twin sister Amber.

Call to Action

Please share this post on social media, join my mailing list, and check out my debut novel Palingenesis.

Character Profile: Sampson Tuner

Description

 He’s six-four, 220lbs, with black hair and dark brown eyes and skin. He’s 39 and has big ears and works as an electrician with a local construction company.

Personality

 Sampson is stoic and aloof, an alpha male type. He’s a know-it-all and can be gruff, but he has a good work ethic. He’s old school when it comes to punishments and secretly resents Travis because of the trust fund his wife’s parents set up for him, while he must scrimp and save every penny just to have a rare night out. As a former lieutenant in the army corps of engineers he demands respect.

Likes

  He likes working with his hands, building things, and fixing antique cars and scooters. He also likes southern foods like corn bread, sweet potatoes, yams, ham hocks and collard greens, BBQ ribs, baked macaroni and cheese, honey glazed ham, jambalaya, red beans and rice, Beer Can chicken, and chitterlings. He also likes tinkering with electronics and is a ham radio enthusiast.

Dislikes

 Sampson dislikes anyone who looks down upon him or underestimates his intelligence because he’s Black and works construction. He also dislikes people assuming he went into the army because he wasn’t smart enough to get into college, when he actually has a master’s in electrical engineering. He hates lazy people and people who game the system and make hard working folks like him look bad.

Goals

  Sampson’s primary goal is raising his kids to be productive members of society. Second, is keeping Travis in the dark about his powers as long as he can. Third, he wants to make enough money to live comfortably instead of barely making ends meet.

Desires

Sampson desires to be respected and valued by his coworkers, to make it into the upper middle class and to live out his golden years in luxury, travelling the world with his wife.

Fears

  Sampson’s greatest fears are (1) his wife cheating on him or divorcing him, (2) being destitute, and (3) Travis learning about his powers and the full extent to which Sampson and his wife allowed the government to experiment on Travis.

Morality/ Religious Beliefs

  Morally, Sampson is lawful good. He follows the rules, even when they don’t make sense, or he doesn’t agree with them. Religiously, he’s Methodist but only goes to church on the major holidays.

Political Alignment

  Sampson is a centrist democrat, conservative on fiscal matters, liberal on some social issues like gay rights, while conservative on others like abortion.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading this post and share it on social media with your friends. Next week’s post will profile Travis’s sister Amber.

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Be sure to sign up to my mailing list for exclusive updates and snippets of my writing. My birthday’s This Friday, so if you haven’t already, pick up your copy of Palingenesis today!

Palingenesis Book Announcement

Welcome!

The tie has finally arrived. Palingenesis releases today, and I couldn’t be more excited you all to dive into this book.

The idea for this story has been stuck in my head since middle school, some 20+ years ago. I’ve been working on this book sporadically for the past 12 years. But it was until the pandemic hit that I got the impetus to finish and release it.

As my amazing editor—Charlie Knight (they/them)—can attest to, this book required a lot of TLC. But after a complete rewrite and multiple revisions, I’m proud of my book baby. I can’t wait for you to meet Travis, Josh, and Pro and have all the feels.

Here’s the blurb:

Hell has no fury like a seventh-grader scorned.

Twelve-year-old Travis Turner fought the devil and won . . . barely. But evil never dies, and now he must master his supernatural abilities before Oblivion grows strong enough to defeat him and jump-start the apocalypse.

However, Travis’s powers cause genome instability, leaving him only months to live if it’s not reversed.

He’s resigned to dying, until JJ Giovanni, the cocky redhead who’s bullies him for years, befriends him.

As their relationship intensifies, so do Travis’s powers, until he’s called to a cave, where he learns truths that forever change him.

To save the people he loves, the world and himself, Travis must let go of all he knows and embrace the hero within.

For fans of Buffy, The X-Men, and Shonen anime/manga.

You can buy Palingenesis at the following universal buy link here.

Review: These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong

These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong

My rating: 2 of 5 stars


These Violent Delights by Chole Gong, is a fantasy retelling of Rome & Juliet set in 1920s Shanghai. In this version, Roma Montagov is heir to the White Flower Gang, and Juliette Cai is heir to the Scarlet Gang; these gangs have been in a blood feud for years and Roma and Juliette are lovers-turned-enemies forced together to solve the mystery of a madness sweeping through the city that causes people to claw out their throats.

I wanted to like this book, but it just didn’t do it for me. I will say the prose was gorgeous, poetic and at times lyrical. And I loved the interaction between Roma and Juliette and Marshall and Benedikt. However, this wasn’t enough to overcome the books many shortcomings.


First, it wasn’t until 100 pages in that plot picked up, then it crept along at a glacial pace. Events would happen, then you’re forced to slog through tons of exposition that had little to no relevance to the plot. I get world building is a thing, but if you’re going to info dump, make it interesting.

Second, this book drags on. It rightly could have been cut in half and you wouldn’t notice it. So many of the scenes/chapters are spent with characters sitting around discussing things that have no bearing on the plot. Politics and social commentary, when done well, are a joy to read, but in this case, I was bored to tears waiting for something to happened. The only reason I didn’t DNF was because of Benedikt and Marshall’s scenes. But by the 60% mark, I started skimming the pages.

Third, there were too many POV characters. Don’t get me wrong. I love books with more than one POV character, when they are done well. In the case of These Violent Delights, outside of Roma, Juliette and Benedikt and Marshall, the other POVs weren’t needed and in the case of Tyler Cai’s lone section, it added nothing that couldn’t have been incorporated into Juliette’s chapters/sections.


Ultimately, by the last 20% of the book I didn’t care who the Larkspur was, who the monster was, or what happened to the main characters.

I also, saw the setup for a sequel coming, but was still angry when the book ended on a massive cliffhanger.

Overall, this felt more like a second or third draft than a finished book. I loved the concept, but it lacked a ton in the execution. If I do read the sequel, I’ll rent it from the library.


I give These Violent Delights 2.0 out of 5 stars. Rent this one from your library or buy when it’s on sale.





View all my reviews

Character Profile Sarah Turner

Description

 Sarah Sophia Turner nee Aurum is thirty-two, five-six, 140 pounds, with blonde hair, blue eyes, and fair skin.

Personality

  She is pretentious, haughty, and money hungry. She often dreams up get rich quick schemes that fail and is a lotto addict.

Sarah can be cold and distant, especially when money is tight. She’s also quick to anger and holds grudges easily. As the only child of Marshall and Helena Aurum, she grew up having anything she wanted, and now that she has to live on a budget, she resents being lower middle class. She and her mother rarely talk since she disowned Sarah for marrying Sampson Turner and having Travis young.  

Likes

 Sarah likes window shopping at luxury stores and dreaming about one day affording said items. She’s also fond of old shows and movies that remind her of her lavish childhood. Sarah also likes dolphins and has a dolphin pendent, which Sampson gave her for their first anniversary. Also, she likes money, power, and being in charge, and is addicted to watching all those real housewives of . . . shows and reading bodice rippers.

Dislikes

Sarah dislikes when people question her authority, disrespect her, or make her feel like she’s not good enough. She hates anything that reminds her she’s not rich or as powerful as she ought to be.  

Goals

  Sarah’s primary goal is becoming wealthy, through any means necessary. Second to this is keeping her family together until the twins graduate college. Third, is becoming the head of the nursing department and head of AP Prep’s PTA.

Desires

  Sarah’s primary desire is to be rich and not have to ever work again. Second, is keeping her kids safe. Third, making sure Travis never finds out about his powers and what she and her husband allowed the government to do to him.

Fears

Her greatest fear is losing everything and being homeless. She also fears Travis finding out about his powers and the harm he could do.

Morality/Religious Beliefs

 Morally, Sarah is lawful neutral; she follows the laws she agrees with, ignores those she doesn’t, and puts the needs of herself and her family above all others.

Religiously, she is Catholic and attends Mass when her job allows time for it.

Political Alignment

  Sarah is a conservative democrat; she’s liberal on fiscal matters but leans to right on social issues like abortion, same-sex marriage, and trans rights.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading. Next week’s post will be all about my book release details. Then I’ll resume the next post in this series on Sampson Turner, Travis’s father.

Call to Action

If you liked this post, please share it on social media.

Also, my aforementioned book is available for pre-orders NOW, at the following link:

Books2read.com/Palingenesis

Character Profile: Cain Giovanni

Description

He’s in his thirties with fiery-red hair, which he keeps in a Caesar cut with a trimmed beard. He’s six-four and 220 pounds of pure muscles, with green eyes and swarthy skin. 

Personality

While sophisticated, he holds boorish opinions on things like gender norms, gender identity and sexual orientation, believing men should be men and women should be women.

He’s highly critical of those around him, expecting only the best. He’s also an ass when it comes to his job as an investment banker, often going out of his way to screw over his competitors and seize assets in hostile takeovers.

He’s best described as a bully and is hard on Josh because he believes his son is “soft”.

Likes

Cain likes cigars, whiskey, and fast food. When not working, he likes to exercise and watch old gangster movies.  He loves power and fame and can never get enough of either. He also loves sex and has several mistresses across the globe who he hooks up with while on business trips. He also likes traditional gender roles, believing women should stay at home and tend to the children. He also loves hunting and fishing when he has the time. Cain’s also a fan of the police and military.

Dislikes

 Cain dislikes anything that can be described as ‘woke” and “progressive,” and hates anything to do with social justice. He thinks BLM and LGBTQ+ rights are a bunch of nonsense and that anyone who believes in them are traitors to the country. He also hates anyone who says, “happy holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas.”

Goals

Cain’s primary goal is gaining enough power, money and fame to take over the world. Second, he wants to mold Josh into a suitable heir, then marry him off to a good family to produce grandchildren.

Desires:  Cain desires sex, adoration, power, and money.

Fears

His greatest fears are being ignored, losing his wealth and power, and never succeeding in his plan for world domination.

Morality/ Religious beliefs

 Cain is Neutral evil and will achieve his goals by any means necessary. He’s a lapsed Catholic and aside from Josh’s baptism and first communion, he hasn’t attended church in decades.

Political Alignment: He’s an outright fascist.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading, please share this post on social media if you liked it. Next week’s post will be a profile of Travis’s mother Sarah Sophia Turner.

Call to Action

Preorders for Palingenesis, my debut YA SFF novel about evil’s chosen one and his boyfriend, are available NOW!

Book2read.com/Palingenesis

Character Profile: Lilith Giovanni

Description

Lilith has platinum blonde hair, hazel eyes, and fair skin. She is five-one and 105 pounds, and often wears heels and designer dresses. She’s in her thirties.

Personality  

She is snobby, condescending, ambitious, and driven. She is also ruthless when it comes to getting what she wants, and critical of everyone, including Josh.

A shopaholic, she has a taste for the finer things in life and can be best described as a grown-up mean girl.

Likes

She likes going to the opera and the Detroit Institute of Art. She’s fond of red wine and shoes, the latter of which she has hundreds of pairs.

She also likes power and being in charge, and loves her job as an investment banker, where she revels in crushing her competition. While she is hard on Josh, she does love him in her own way—as she does her husband.

Dislikes

She dislikes sweating, camping, or doing anything where she can’t get cell reception. She also a neat freak and germaphobe, who dislikes poor people, believing they’re lazy and should be dealt with.

Lilith also dislikes any negative attention brought on her and her family. She absolutely hates being belittled.

Goals

Her primary goal is to be the best at her job to maintain her lifestyle. Second, she wants to maintain her image as mother of the year. Third, she wants to become famous and expand her influence in the world.

Desires  

Lilith desires power, individuality, and control over her life. She also wants Josh to become a respectable man.

Fears

Her greatest fear is being powerless and finding herself enslaved by another. Also, she fears being poor and losing face in her social circle. She also fears something happening to Josh.

Morality/Religious Beliefs

Morally she is neutral evil and believes gaining power is the most important thing in life and will use any method to achieve this goal. While an atheist, she raised Josh to be Catholic.

Political Alignment

She is an authoritarian with fascist leanings.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading. Next week’s post will be Cain Giovanni, Josh’s father.

Call to Action

If you enjoyed this post, please share it on social media. Also Palingenesis is now available for preorder at the link below and releases September 1st.

books2read.com/Palingenesis

Grams Character Profile

Description

She has grey hair with pale blue eyes, and a heart-shaped face. She’s seventy-seven, five-foot two, and ninety pounds. Her full name is Helena Troy Ziglar-Aurum, and she’s the richest woman in the world, owing to her being the oldest of the Ziglar children and heiress to the Cadmus fortune.  She has a hunch due to having polio as a child.

Personality

 She’s fiercely protective of her loved ones but has a legendary temper and will hold grudges for years. Old-school and no-nonsense, she says what’s on her mind with little regard for people’s feeling. When she was younger, she was a big tomboy, preferring climbing trees and going hunting to playing dolls and having tea parties. She’s also a reformed racist and tries to keep up with current events like LGBTQ+ rights and BLM.

Likes

She likes her mystery novels and watching movies from her childhood on the Classic Movie Channel. She’s also fond of horses and has several on the Aurum Estate, along with a few pugs and cockatoos to keep her company. Helena is passionate about helping others and attends several charity events each month, and when not doing that, she plays bridge with her friends and takes salsa lessons on the weekends. She also knits and crochets clothes for her family and friends Her favorite person in the world is Travis.

Dislikes

Helena hates rude people and people who think they’re better than everyone just because they’re wealthy. She also has a long-standing feud with Travis’s mother, her daughter and only child, and their fights are epic. She also hates how Travis’s parents treat him and how they allowed the DMRC to experiment on him.  Her biggest pet peeve is fake people who only act nice to her because of her vast fortune.

Goals

Helena’s primary goal is enjoying her golden years and using her money to do the greatest good. Second, she wants to spend time with her loved ones, such as her great nephew Austin and grandson Travis. She also wants to find a suitable successor to run her businesses until Travis comes of age to assume control of them.

Desires

 Helena wants to undo all the evil her husband and his friends have caused over the years. She also wants Travis to use his powers for good.

Fears

 She fears not having enough time with her loved ones and not being able to counteract her husband’s evildoings. Helena also fears whomever she chooses as her successor will use their wealth and power for nefarious means and all the work she did will be for naught.

 Morality/ Religious Belief

 Morally, she’s chaotic good and follows her own code of conduct with little regard for what the law says. Religiously, she’s Protestant and goes to church several times a week. She’s very serious about her faith.

Political Alignment

Helena is an east coast liberal elite who favors libertarian values like individualism and freedom of choice and association.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading. Next week’s post will be on Josh’s parents.

Call to Action

Palingenesis is now available for preorder and you can pick up a copy at the link below.

books2read.com/Palingenesis

Character Profile: Oblivion

Description: Oblivion’s true form would drive people mad if they glimpsed it, so he often appears to Travis either as him with all his color drained or a giant, seven-headed, red dragon. He is ageless, having existed since before the universe began.

 Personality:  He is a bit of a curmudgeon, snobbish, and haute. He has a superiority complex and is quick to anger when he feels slighted. He’s also a Machiavellian chess master, often bending the truth or outright lying to turn people to his side.

Likes:  He likes powers, control, and sowing seeds of chaos and doubt in the minds of other. He delights in turning people’s soul evil and causing strife.

Dislikes:  Oblivion hates being imprisoned in the Nullverse and being made to feel impotent. He also dislikes being disrespected by his inferiors, and having his time wasted.

Goals:  His primary goal is getting Travis to fulfill his destiny, so that he will be free of the Nullverse. Second, is exacting revenge on those who exiled him to the Nullverse. And in general, he wants to gather as many souls as possible by corrupting them through their dreams.

Desires:  Oblivion desires power, and the freedom that comes with it, above all else.

Fears:  He fears being powerless and never being free from the Nullverse.

Morality/ Religious Beliefs: Oblivion is chaotic evil, beholden to no laws or moral code, only caring about himself and causing as much pain and suffering as he can. The only thing he values is power, believing it is the destiny of the strong to prey upon the weak.

 Political Alignment: He is an authoritarian, believing might makes rights and has no scruples about using any method to achieve his goals.         

Review: I Wish You All the Best

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I Wish You All the Best, by Mason Deaver, is a YA contemporary romance and coming of age novel about Ben De Backer, a high school senior who is nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns.
After coming out to their parents, they are kicked out in the middle of winter and go to live with their older sister Hanna and her husband Thomas.

At Ben’s new school they are befriend by Nathan Allen, and they soon develop feelings for him. However, Ben isn’t out to Nathan or anyone else at school.

I loved this book, and though I’m cis, Ben’s journey to accepting their self and dealing with their anxiety, depression, and issues of self love and self worth resonated with me as I’ve struggled with those issues too.

Also, the way they overthought things, were super self conscious, and how they expected the worst gave me flashbacks of my teen years.

I loved the voice in this; it was as though Ben was telling it right to me. But have a few issues. I found some of Ben’s actions stupid/borderline selfish such as how they resented Hanna for abandoning them when she left home or how they didn’t tell her about the message from their mom and their meeting with their parents.

Also, I felt Nathan’s character did veer into manic pixie dream boy and magical negro territory at times. Nathan spends the bulk of the book trying to get Ben out of his shell and being his emotional support. Aside from his being comedic relief, hot, and liking books (which he’s never shown reading), there isn’t much to his character. And most of the other characters get the same superficial treatment. Besides Ben and Nathan, Mariam, Ben’s nonbinary Muslim vlogger friend, is the only character who’s given depth.

The ending also felt a bit rushed.

Overall, I did enjoy this book and highly recommend it. I give I Wish You All the Best four out of five stars.




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Review: The Taking of Jake Livingston

The Taking of Jake Livingston by Ryan Douglass

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


The Taking of Jake Livingston, by Ryan Douglass, is a YA horror novel that follows the eponymous Black, gay, teen medium as he attempts to stop Sawyer Doon, a school shooter turned vengeful ghost, from continuing his killing spree and possessing Jake.

Jake attends St. Clair Prep, a prestigious private school where he is one of only two Black students there and is often the target of racist comments and actions from students and teachers alike.
Jake lacks confidence in himself and rarely speaks up, the former of which Sawyer plays on to torment and possess him.

I connected with Jake’s selective mutism as I was bullied in school too and stopped speaking completely unless I was forced to talk by teachers.

Only by finding his voice and confidence in himself can Jake banish Sawyer for good.
I was on the fence about continuing this book after learning Sawyer was a POV character, and I could see how others would be put off by reading about a psychopathic killer who ultimately kills himself during his school shooting.

However, Douglass wrote Sawyer’s chapters in such a way to humanize him without condoning his actions or painting him in a sympathetic light.

Though, I think this book could have benefited from content warnings regarding scenes depicting the school shooting and a sexual assault later in the book.

Overall, I loved this book and devoured it in three days. All I have to say is wow and when’s the sequel coming out.

I Give The Taking of Jake Livingston five out of five stars. Definitely read this one.




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Review: Fifteen Hundred Miles from the Sun

Fifteen Hundred Miles from the Sun by Jonny Garza Villa

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Fifteen Hundred Miles from the Sun, by Jonny Garza Villa, is a YA romance about Julian “Jules” Luna and Mat Pham, two high school senior boys who begin a long-distance relationship when Mat slides into Jules’s DMs after He gets drunk one night and comes out on social media
This book deals with toxic masculinity, domestic abuse, and general homophobia. Jules’s father forces him to go to a private Catholic prep school and beats him when he does anything that seems “gay”.
Over the course of the story, Jules finds the strength to stand up for himself against his father and the homophobic students at his school and live his best life.

I loved the voice in this. It was so conversational, and it felt like Jules was a friend telling you the story. It reminded me a lot of The Perks of Being a Wallflower, only gayer, more modern, and set in Texas.

Jules’s friends all seemed like real people, and I especially loved his friend Lou who stole the show in every scene they were in. His friend Jordan was also hilarious. However, I thought Jules’s older sister Xochi was a bit one note, and I thought she was little more than a plot device to move the story along.

Another thing I loved about this book is it addressed the issues queer people of color deal with, such as racism from white LGBTQ+ folks and queer phobia within communities of color.

Another issue I was surprised that this book tackled was how some nonblack people of color are racist towards Black people.

I also loved how Mat and Jules were both people of color. So often in YA romances you have a passive love interest of color paired with a white one. So, it was nice to see a brown queer couple in love and unapologetically embrace their cultures.

If I had one criticism, it’s that the ending felt a bit too Disney. But otherwise, I loved this book. Five out of five stars. I highly recommend you read this book like now!




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